ALL SPORTS

I thought I would soon tire of these guys, but I still find them funny and their show on 1040 is refreshing. Who knew? That being said some of the best insights and sports-related comedy is on this NG! Thank you guys (and girls).
“The streets are safe in Philadelphia, it's only the people that make them unsafe.” - Former city mayor Frank Rizzo
Everyone knows Philadelphia sports fans are crazy. They throw batteries at Santa Claus and step over Michael Irvin’s lifeless body to fight Tie Domi in the penalty box. Or something like that.
Yet over the past few months, the Phanatics have seemingly met their match in the athletes themselves. Forget the safety of the streets; it’s the playing surfaces they should be worrying about.
Let’s review.
In June, the Flyers acquired Chris Pronger, one of the few players in NHL history to be suspended for stomping. (We should remind everyone that hockey players wear skates. Also, skates are sharp. )
The Flyers also brought back controversial goaltender Ray Emery from exile in Russia. He spent last season with Atlant Moscow, where he roughed up the team’s trainer for suggesting he wear a sponsor’s hat.
Pronger and Emery will join the likes of Scott Hartnell, Ian Laperriere and Dan Carcillo, all three of whom are simply delightful.
On the baseball front, the Phillies inked pitcher Pedro Martinez, famous for winning three Cy Young awards but also for a trio of less auspicious achievements: grabbing 72-year-old Don Zimmer by the head and throwing him to ground, parading a good-luck midget around the Red Sox locker room, and admitting involvement in a Dominican Republic- based cockfighting tournament.
It would take, you’d think, a pretty bold signing to top those. No problem, said the Eagles. How about forking over $1.6 million to the former owner of a canine rape stand? Welcome to the party, Michael Vick.
With Pronger, Emery, Martinez and Vick aboard, Philadelphia might just be the most combustible sports city ever. But it’s not without a few challengers.